Middle Eastern Christian Dating

admin 12/23/2021

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LONDON - Cultural pressures can make the dating world seem like an overwhelming mine field.

I remember the first time I felt the pressure to get married. I was standing in church at a close friend’s wedding, freshly graduated from university and excited to enter the “real world.” That was also the first time I had heard the Arabic courtesy idiom “o’baleek,” which translates into something like “hopefully, your turn is next.”

It was soon to become a phrase I’d hear repeatedly at weddings and engagement parties but it was that first wedding I had attended that marked me the most.

Standing in church at the wedding, two of my mother’s friends greeted me with firm hugs and an even firmer message: “Now that you’ve graduated, you need to find a good husband and get married.”

I laughed the statement off and didn’t take much of it. I thought then it was totally ludicrous. However, the older I became — and as more of my friends married — I heard that statement with increasing frequency. Not only from strangers and random aunties at church but from close family relatives and friends.

I was getting closer to hitting the mid-20s in my life with no engagement ring on my finger. An absolute disaster in our Middle Eastern culture. The pressure to find a suitable match at the difficult-to-define “marrying age” is very strong and real. It can leave some young women feeling wrongly incomplete and unaccomplished.

The pressure isn’t just in finding someone, it is in finding someone suitable. The qualities and characteristics of the individual are measured and scrutinised to conclude whether the person in question is an adequate match.

As a Coptic Christian living in the United Kingdom, it is hard enough to find somebody from the same background and somebody who shares the same beliefs, let alone has the acceptable occupation, family and personal attributes. It sometimes feels virtually impossible to meet someone who meets your expectations — and your family’s expectations, too.

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My family has made it clear there are certain expectations in finding a suitable match. “Love” isn’t enough. One must decide with the mind as well as the heart and make a sound and logical choice as to the person with whom she should spend the rest of her life.

Choosing from the same church or culture also is not enough. If his family is not to the same social or financial standard of your family, that could be a pesky issue. Also, if he is not working towards a good, stable and highly remunerative job, this will be a sticking point that many parents will not tolerate lightly.

I recently became aware of the experience of one of my close friends from church who was dating another close friend from the church. They were both good people with good hearts and very kind natures.

She, however, was from a very stable, middle-class family and he was not. Given his less-than-stable upbringing by a single mother with a working-class status, the girl’s family found it hard to accept him as a suitor for their daughter.

The relationship eventually broke down as it could not survive the constant scrutiny of her family. This young man was shunned, even though he is from the same community and culture, with good attributes and working towards a great future in medicine. His family background from a “broken home,” however, was too much to accept by the other family.

This is not the first and unfortunately will not be the last time a situation like that occurs in my culture. It is a very upsetting and unsettling thought that good-hearted young men are being shunned for something that is too often indefinable and out of their control.

Families from Middle Eastern backgrounds and upbringings living in the West need to broaden their minds beyond their impossibly restrictive expectations. Happiness may not necessarily require the fulfilment of all such expectations.

Gender
Female 29
Country
Australia
City
Middle eastern
State
Victoria
Height
5'9'
Last Login Date
Age
29
Eye Color
Brown
Body Type
Average
Hair Color
Brown
Ethnicity
Middle Eastern
Denomination
Evangelical
Looking For
A Marriage Partner
Church Name
Church
Church Attendance
Several times a year
Church Raised In
Orthodox
Do you drink?
No
Smoker
No

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Willing to relocate?
Possibly, who knows
Marital Status
Single
Do you have children?
No
Do you want children?
Want Children
Education Level
Masters/Post Grad
My Profession
Med science
Interests
About Me
I am looking for something serious which leads to marriage.Compassionate, God fearing,honest, patient,loyal,friendly
I like outdoor activities, swimming, singing,playing volleyball, rafting ,travelling, learning new cultures
First Date
I want to meet with that person in a certain place to know him better .Jesus Christ is central important for me
He has saved us and called us to a holy life—not because of anything we have done but because of his own purpose and grace. This grace was given us in Christ Jesus before the beginning of time.
2 Timothy 1:9
I am a godly christian, caring, loving, respectful, truthful, honest, open - minded, understanding, compassionate, affectionate, more serious, laid back . I like to share God's word everywhere i go with others .
if we say that we are born again christian, we will walk according God's commandments, it simply means that we will live in spirit and not in flesh . Satan's pleasures dwell in flesh and we cannot please God walking in flesh
We cannot get married with an unbeliever according the book of 2 Corinthians 6: 14 to 17.
Also because it would be two different spirits in that marriage. The Spirit of God (Holy Spirit) in the believer life and the spirit of Satan( evil spirit) in the unbeliever life.
According the book of Galatians 5 : 17 , there is no agreement between the Spirit of God in true believers and the spirit of Satan in unbelievers .
I thank God for his grace to have understanding about his word and i want to bring this short exhortation to our genuine brothers and sisters in Christ in this site .
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